About the start of it

Since I was 12 years of age, I have suffered from a little know about disorder called Body Dimorphic Disorder. It's an image disorder that affects the way a person suffering from it perceives them self. Many of us think we are monstrous looking and see some one in the mirror that no one else see's.

For more info on BDD go to http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Body_dysmorphic_disorder

In my case, I did not leave the house the entire summer after 5th grade. I stayed locked in my dark room and always wore something to mask my face even from my own family. I litterly left the house 4 times in the whole summer break, and 2/4 times I kept my face covered . When I entered into 6th I would apply HIDIOUS amounts of makeup and even hid my face the first day. I was surly the black sheep at the time, which made me worse. I barley attended school, I missed so much my grades dropped to straight F's. I even ended up into the Psychiatric hospital that year, for a few days.

In Jr. High, our family had moved out of that town and I was starting in a new district. Though, I no longer masked my face or wore odd amounts of makeup, I was still VERY mentally unstable and anorexic, and was not able to stand staying in a school building all day. So, I allowed my self to go on a Digital Academy to became well. By the middle of 7th my grades where increasing and by 8th I was getting A's and B's. During Jr. High home schooling, I eventually joined a support group, I remember being terrified around other teens and tweens, but they had treated me So nicely! There for, my mental stability, had become so much better I got involved in a local theatre for acting, which helped me gain enough confidence I could actually go out in public EVERY day! I was back in, school, and I'm not doing to bad, actually GREAT. I still have bad days but I'm highly funcinable in society.

Untill I was threatend by a student, causing my recovering to go down the drain.